


If this isn't heaven

by orphan_account



Category: Phandom, Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF), Welcome to Hell - All Media Types
Genre: Dark, M/M, Murder-Suicide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:53:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23881858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: NOTICE: The Welcome to Hell fandom is derived from a 10-minute animation by Erica Wester. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5LQe5nR2CgMI am using the concept and start of the plot to derive my own fiction primarily based in the Phandom. You can easily understand this fic without knowing a thing about the WTH fandom, whereas those from the WTH fandom might not understand everything referenced in this fic.For as long as he can remember, Phil has been obsessed with killing. Ending the life of other living things provided him with pleasure, and even though he tried to control himself, he woke to discover he had killed his parents in his sleep. Ordinary people would be left quite shaken to awake knowing you caused the death of your parents, but Phil was far from Ordinary. He was more concerned about what came next. Phil buried his parents, and himself that night. After a surprisingly calm waking in hell, Phil is given an offer he literally cannot refuse. He is to torment a teenage boy named Dan until the boy is driven to suicide.
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Kudos: 3





	If this isn't heaven

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Welcome to Hell](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/612946) by Erica Wester. 



I awoke cold. My teeth chattered as I examined my surroundings. This wasn’t me. It couldn’t have been me. I looked down, my hands were dripping with blood. Their blood. My knife was below my feet and I knew what I had to do. “Fuck”. I breathed heavily as I heaved their bodies out of the house and towards the hill a few miles outside of the house. I brought a shovel from the garage and began to dig. Shouldn’t I be bothered by this? I begged myself for an answer, but I wasn’t. I wasn’t until I realized what came next. I tossed my parents into their respective holes and covered them with dirt. I’d found some rocks shaped strangely like headstones. Three. I labelled them Mum, Dad, and.. Me.

\----------

Flashbacks flooded my head as I stared at my own grave. The time I scared the little girl down the street away by showing her the Squirrel I had killed. It was adorable, I love animals, but I felt no shame. I couldn’t do this anymore. I didn’t know why, but as far as I was told, I didn’t deserve to live any longer. I was about to finish my final kill. Myself. I picked up the blade, still red with my Parents’ blood. I chuckled. “Never thought I’d be on the other end of you mate”, I sighed holding the dear knife. “Oh well. How do these things go anyway?” I couldn’t think of any last words, so I stood in the pit I’d dug for myself, closed my eyes, and drove the blade as far as I could into my chest as everything went black. The last thing I ever felt was wet and dizzy. 

I woke to see an unfamiliar face. He was a tall goofy looking chap in a red suit. He leaned over me offering a hand. I took it. “Welcome to Hell!” He exclaimed. Why was I being welcomed to the place that was supposed to be my eternal suffering and torment? Why did he offer me his hand? He flung me into a pristine white office with questionable design choices. The strange man had a wide monitor labelled Macrosoft. God this really was hell wasn’t it. “Let me find your case file,” The strange man said in a smooth and dynamic voice, like a radio host. He leaned over to a filing cabinet allowing the drawer to fly open smashing through the wall with what seemed to be infinite amounts of files. I have to be in hell. Where else could this possibly be? Why was he being so kind to me? His eyes darted left and right frantically, I was surprised my human eyes could keep pace. Were my eyes even human anymore? I had so many questions but I held myself together. “So, how’d you get into killing?” The man asked with a cheery tone. “It’s uh, kinda personal.” I manage with a shiver. “I won’t tell a soul” the man assured me. I knew better than to talk to him if this really was Satan, he had our souls meaning he couldn’t tell a soul, only a lifeless tormented corpse. He had to be playing mind games with me. “It’s kind of a long story” I muttered hoping this would be a good enough excuse or at least give him the hint. “Trust me, kid, I’ve got an eternity”. He swung around holding two files. Opening the first one he laughed. “Killed your parents ‘eh?” “Uh, yeah” I managed. “Y’know what, Lester, I think we’ll get along just fine”. “Yeah about that, why am I not being eternally tormented yet?” The man (Satan?) chuckled “A bit eager don’t you think? Don’t sweat it, we’re going under renovations and can’t house any more souls for the time being, so instead, I have an offer. “Great, making deals with the devil…” I mumbled. “I’ve already got your soul Lester, what I want from you is a different kind of service. Think of it as a job. You’ll be assigned a Human to haunt and torment until they reach the same tragic end as yourself.” “Are you telling me I get to kill people after I’m dead?” “Uh, not quite I’m afraid. We don’t have that much power, but you are able to drive someone to take their own life. That’s your job.” “What if I refused? What if I didn’t want this job?” “Oh but you won’t, and trust me, you do.” Great, can’t argue with that. He continues listing off working conditions and possesses my hands to sign contract upon contract but I wasn’t really paying attention. The boy I was assigned seemed so easy. He was a teenager and lived just south of where I was from. I stared closely at the image of his face. He had curly hair swept to the side of his soft youthful face. He clearly wasn’t looking at the camera when this was taken. He seemed distracted by something below him. I could still peer into his deep chocolate eyes. “So when do I start, Mr, uh..” “Oh please, call me Mephistopheles! Y’know not everyone gets this offer. You remind me of myself kiddo. The way you’re not phased by much, you’ve got an appreciation for bright things, and you’ve got a smile on your face while you do it.” “In that case, you can call me Phil.” “Alrighty Lester, Phil it is!” “You ready?” “I think so, for what exactly?” I was left with nothing but a cheeky wink as I was tossed face-first back into the real world.

\----------

This had to be the strangest thing I could’ve imagined. I was lying on the floor, facing the sky like an idiot. It felt so magical, to feel again, but this time it was different. I felt emotions that I just hadn’t felt before. A truck pulled up near me and I remained lying on the ground helplessly. A man stumbled out of a delivery truck humming along and as I was sure he was going to crush me beneath his boot, it phased right through me. I was invincible. The man rang the doorbell as he lumbered back to his truck and drove off. I tried making contact with other things, there were some ants marching between the cracks of the pavement, but despite my every effort to squeeze the life out of them with the press of my finger, it went right through them. I was dumbfounded and started fidgeting with my clothes. I rubbed my fingers between the soft flannel I was wearing. I was interrupted by a tall boy, a very tall boy at that. He was even taller than me, you don’t see that every day. He was wearing a silly little brown hat, and as he looked down at me he frowned. Sighing, he stepped over me, grabbed his package and made his way back inside without a second thought. I peeled myself up off the ground without a scratch and reached for the handle. My hand just phased through it like the ants, so I walked through the entire door without a problem. I heard humming down the hall but I needed a game plan. I didn’t have the slightest clue what was going on here. I was waiting in the lobby of the apartment complex, but I wasn’t sure what I was waiting for exactly. I spotted the boy once more, this had to be him. So he was Dan. He didn’t pay me any attention as he strolled through another hallway. Not a moment later a man was sitting uncomfortably close to me. It was Mephistopheles, he gave me a twisted smile. “What the fuck is going on here? Why can’t I touch things? Why can’t I-” “Kill things?” He supplied. “I need an explanation.” “You harm living things, if you try you’ll just make a fool out of yourself. You won’t be seen by anyone, except Dan” “Are you sure he can see me? He paid no attention to me just now, like I didn’t exist. Well, he gave me a funny look but he hasn’t said a word.” “Trust me, I’m sure. He can see you clear as day, he’s watching you talk to yourself right now!” “H-” I was interrupted once again before I could make another sound. “He can’t see me, they can’t see you, but he can see you.” He offered. “Make him feel like he’s crazy- like he’s got no choice but to give up.” Sheesh, so this guy was serious. “I’ll check back on ya later kiddo” Mephistopheles smirks and the next thing I know, he's just gone. No fancy exit, he’s just gone.

**Author's Note:**

> The Dialogue and obviously plot may seem very similar to WTH but I can assure you that after this Pilot chapter it's a smooth sailing original plot from here forth! I have yet to set a date for the release of Chapter 2, but let me know if you enjoyed so I can keep writing!


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